Hypertrusteeship: Pluses and Minuses

Now in the discussions with experts and parents, it is possible to meet two extreme points of view regarding the questions of the socialization of children. The first position is connected with the desire to structure the children's life as much as possible (school, different sections, the strict house control including games and play). Owing to it, the child has less time to be "idle". The second tendency is to give "full" freedom to children: to enable them to play, to remove estimations and tests at schools, even to remove lessons as the structured activity. Owing to it, the child will not feel any pressure. 

Savitsky K.A. 'Dissonance".

In the given post I would like to consider the results of the researches which can illustrate the influence of the first tendency on the children and show the influence of this tendency from the point of view of small respondents. For this purpose, I shall address to the questionnaires of the parents, and also to the  interviews of the children.

The interest of parents in children’s success in life does not cause any doubts.  According to the results of one of my researches, more than 70 % of parents have told that it is necessary to find «as much as possible time» for their children. Some answers sounded as follows: «The more - the better », «24 hours per day ». However, if we look at the answers of the parents we will see the attributes of hypertrusteeship, i.e. the constant desire to supervise the child. 

How  is the  hypertrusteeship reflected in the interviews of the children?  Certainly, many children have drawn the happiest events in their lives which took place in their families, with mum,  daddy and other relatives. But there are also moments which can provoke us to think. According to the results of the test of  Rosenzweig (when the children are shown pictures with various conflict situations and it is necessary to tell what they would do if they were the represented heroes), the children have shown the readiness to solve problems independently and to show the initiative in the relationships with peers. But, as soon as there was an adult in the represented picture, the children began to demand the decision of the problem from the adult, or they concerned  the  situation as due, or  they fixed on the problem, i.e. wished to solve nothing. It is interesting, the number of interviews with the boys when they searched for justifying circumstances for their acts  increased almost in four times when  there were the adults in the represented situations.   

Also, it is necessary to remember, that interdictions of adults can also influence how children perceive this or that game.  Preschool children often quote the statements of parents and other adults why they did not play any games, why it was not recommended to them.  But play and games are «good risks » for children, the opportunity to feel the forces and borders and the constant control and interdictions do not support the "creative" discovery of space.

Not only interdictions but also the habits of adults influence how children perceive the reality and what they do. For example, the daddy often plays computer games, while the child is standing near, seeing what is on the screen, experiencing and identifying the situation.

Summing up the said above: the parents say that that the hypertrusteeship is not the desire to supervise the child, it's the wish to be near the child, to feel an emotional attachment, etc. In the reality, it often turns into the constant control which has the specificity.

Probably, it is important, how to be present in the life of the child.  I will write about it in the following post: "Freedom or Lonelinnes"?

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